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Friday, November 27, 2009

Being Lead Through Darkness

Though I don't always feel His Presence, God has ways of showing me He is indeed with me and is leading me. I have been doing quite a bit of research on cancer and find some of the ways He has lead me through that. The other day I was reading Anti Cancer by David Servan-Schreiber, MD, PhD. On page 46 I came across some important information about tumor growth. I will quote him:
"3. The new tumor cells that spread to the rest of the body-metastases-are dangerous only when they are able, in turn, to attract new blood vessels.; 4. Large primary tumors send out metastases. But, as in any colonial empire, they prevent these distant territories from becoming too important by producing another chemical substance that blocks the growth of new blood vessels-angiostatin. (This explains why metastases sometimes suddenly grow once the principal tumor has been surgically removed.)" italics mine.
I was so excited to read this! You see, I didn't know why I was SO against the removal of the primary tumor in my breast, other than I wasn't going to let anyone take my breast from me. But my protection of myself from surgery was deeper than that. I felt a deep-seated sense of stubborn defiance of ANYONE coming near that breast! It was something that was beyond me that I could not understand myself or explain to others. Reading that having my primary tumor removed would also remove protection against the metastases growing made me want to leap up and praise God for His protection. It clicked! I understood why I felt the way I did! And I thought I was just being stubborn! But there was something so much deeper and I just didn't realize it was God's leading. You see, I know because of how aggressive my cancer is that it had metastasized before I even discovered it six months ago. I didn't know how to keep those metastases from growing but He did. And He lead me in darkness...in ways I have not known. Praise Him!
It made me realize the importance of treating cancer 'wholistically' not just tumor by tumor in an isolated fashion. It also makes me ask the question: If they know this, why do they take out the primary tumor in the first place? Isn't that just asking for trouble? I'll leave you to think about that.

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